Hey Mom, as you are desiring to be heard, understood, known, I see you.
I see you…
- struggling to respond to your atmosphere with peace
- wrestling with emotions that hit your mind and send you to react with a tearful “not enough”
- striving to understand how these attacks of emotion can be overcome
Come close. Gather at the table with me. Get your coffee mug inscribed with that favorite phrase that motivates you to rise in your day. Listen to my heart for you.
I have a few things that I want you to hear and to receive.
This letter is for you.
I had three babies in three years and it felt like both my body and my mind were on the most treacherous journey. I tried so hard not to feel that I was drowning and to stand with grace. I am going on six years mothering and growing into my role as mother has not been an easy process for me. In that time of new babies, hard pregnancies, and a new asking of me, I cried more than I rejoiced. I felt “not enough” more than grace-filled and there were some dark days. I would hear words like “postpartum depression” and think “well, that’s not me because it has been ‘too long’ since my babies were born” and I would suppress it. It was not a place of vulnerability for my heart, because I feared that if it showed, then I was not stepping into my new role with gratitude, but with complaint. I allowed that belief to be an anchor of my spirit as I mothered and let me say with a passion, “THAT NEVER HOLDS UP.” The anchor gave way and I felt stranded in the sea waiting for someone at the shoreline to save me.
If you are feeling some of these emotions as you strive to be enough for everyone in your life, I urge you to take a step back and ask for help. Say something, to someone.
Holding in the belief that you “should” be at a certain place will only keep you feeling pressures you were never intended to meet. You might feel that you are “not enough.” That view will paralyze your movements and strip you of growth.
Lower your expectations.
You are learning, you are growing, and you need the space to BE YOU without comparing your story to someone else’s.
Every time you believe those insignificant thoughts about yourself, what you don’t see is the chains they place upon you. With each passing thought, another one follows until you find yourself stuck.
Freedom comes when you speak truth.
If you struggle to believe that goodness is found amidst the hard times, REACH OUT to let someone voice encouragement in your story. See a friend, call a counselor, a doctor, a pastor or join a moms group.
For you see, Mom, you need beauty, not thorns, as you grow. Your first step is to just “say something, to someone.” You have a band of mothers waiting to hear your story and to walk with you in your growth. I found my strength when I was able to voice my difficulty and hear other mothers say, “ME TOO.”