What I didn’t know, was that just hearing your heartbeat could make me have a change of heart. That despite all of the thoughts and negative connotations I had of children up until I got that positive test, I’d love you unconditionally. I would never have thought that seeing your face in black and white would bring happy tears to my eyes, but they did. Those moments lead me to who I am today. Your mama.
Today, I look back and mourn over the long-gone days of you being a tiny baby. But today, I celebrate your victories – the obstacles you have overcome and the milestones you have reached! Today, I yearn for more with you – to watch you learn, play and grow into a tiny gentleman. Today, I am nothing but proud to be your mama.
But tomorrow? I am anxious and excited for your tomorrows. I often wonder what your hobbies will be, what your friends will be like, if you’ll like cars like your daddy does, and at what point will you be too cool to be seen with ole’ mom? I daydream about your first crush, school dances and getting my first call from the principal saying, “You can pick him up late today, he has detention.” (As much as I hope to not receive that call!)
I look forward to you being at mine and your dad’s wedding. We may not have done things the traditional way, but I’m glad we didn’t. I wouldn’t want to imagine my tomorrows, or the days after, without you!
