To My Daughter,
Am I failing you? As I sit across from you, me at my desk and you at yours, I can’t help but wonder if I am doing enough to help you through this year. You are my oldest; you are independent, strong, and adapt easily to most situations. Sometimes I think you are older than you are, you are wise beyond your years.
As we entered into the decision on how to handle your schooling this year amidst a global pandemic, you gracefully and maturely accepted the idea of switching to a completely virtual school. You are my extrovert and I know how you love people and being around friends. As your mom, I also know that you needed consistency and that was a driving force in doing what we thought was best for you. I want you to thrive and learn so you can accomplish everything you want to do. You are only 7 but you have big plans and you will change this world.
There have been days where you have cried and yelled in frustration about the “dumb virus” and all it has changed for us.
Trust me, baby, we all have done the same. You have impressed me with your strength and courage to do something new and take the change in stride most days. You are working so hard and doing so well. You have your days, like we all do, and on those days, I wonder what I can do to take away your frustration. I desperately wish that I could just sit next to you and be with you each day as you work. I know it can get lonely sitting at your desk working while the house bustles around you. I know that you know and understand that your younger siblings need my attention, too, my job needs my attention, running our home needs my attention. I cannot sit with you all day.
You talk with your teacher and classmates virtually but I know it’s not enough for your social spirit. I know you want to be back in a classroom, running on the playground, and making jokes at the lunch table. You will be back there soon, I promise this will end. In the meantime, I hope you know that I am doing my best to help you and I know how hard it is. I want you to look back and learn that you can do anything. Life throws you curveballs and things don’t always go your way. As much as I wish I could rescue you from this, I can’t. There is always something to learn from these types of experiences and I want you to know your strength, your bravery, and how you have worked hard to overcome and to learn.
I am in awe of you.
I want you to know that on the days you are feeling down, where nothing seems fair, I am with you, I understand, and my love for you is immeasurable. I am strong for you, but I am crying in frustration and sadness for the changes, too. We will get through this together, and I will continue to watch in amazement as you tackle life head-on and don’t let anything get in your way.