I have eaten every type of bagel at Panera–in fact the cinnamon crunch bagels are probably solely responsible for my last ten pounds of post-baby weight. And once a year a special brand of bagel arrives for just 30 sweet days, rivaling the fall favorites around town and maybe even beating out the pumpkin spice latte for a favorite fall treat. This October, Panera’s famous Pink Ribbon Bagel returns–the only bagel there that’s not just a bagel.
I admit I used to pay no attention to any of the money-seeking causes that bombard consumers when going through many checkout lines. That is, until the cause mattered to me personally. In 2006, my stepmother Marilyn Maag, a Cincinnati mother and lawyer, was diagnosed with Stage 2 breast cancer. Until then, I’d never known anyone with cancer, so I moved through my day not really noticing or feeling anything when I saw pink (or any color) ribbon bumper stickers, t-shirts, or bagels.
It really only takes one day and one phone call for it to become personal.
When I asked Marilyn to recall the painful days and weeks of first finding out she had breast cancer, she remembered having to make quick and difficult decisions– the decision to remove both breasts in a double mastectomy to rid her body of many small tumors and to begin her first rounds of chemotherapy and breast reconstruction. She remembers the grief of losing both natural breasts in the surgery, just weeks after learning her diagnosis and beginning a journey of coming to grips with the reality of her new body. Breast cancer, in particular, seems to challenge the identity of a woman in addition to the strength of spirit.
“Even now, in 2018, I feel grief about the alteration of my body. It is still challenging to feel relaxed and confident about my appearance as a woman”.
Throughout that year she would undergo multiple surgeries to reconstruct her breasts, and she remembers a defining moment after beginning chemo, in which she had to begin her journey towards emotional recovery:
“I remember the sorrow and fear I felt when I looked at my body with two bright red scars across my chest and no hair at all on my body.”
She remembers making the decision to consciously fight off depression.
“I chose to continue to work at my job throughout the year of treatment; to give as much care and attention to my son and daughter, who were only 11 and 8 years old at that time; to go outside for walks; to pursue prayer and meditation; and to talk openly with family and friends about what I was going through and struggling with.”
Marilyn’s testimony about needing friends and family directly aligns with the mission of Pink Ribbon Girls, the organization benefited by Panera’s Pink Ribbon Bagel Campaign. Their mission statement declares “Pink Ribbon Girls provides Healthy Meals, Housecleaning, Rides to Treatment, and Peer Support to individuals with breast and gynecological cancers free of charge,” and their website discusses lightening the burden for women with cancer and their families, ensuring “no one travels this road alone.” Marilyn carried the support of her children through her journey, especially her daughter Sierra Barlow, now a junior in college, who was greatly impacted by her mother’s strength.
She remembers sitting in a prayer circle as an elementary student, wanting to volunteer when her teacher asked if anyone wanted to pray for anything. She remembers finding out her mom had cancer. And finding out again 9 years later that it had come back.
“I was in a sort of shocked state driving over because I couldn’t believe that after so long it would come back. I hadn’t really prepared myself mentally…” she said. “Watching my mom go through all of that twice has shown me how strong we can be when facing hard times. It has really inspired me to be more like her – strong, independent, loving, understanding.”
1 in 8 women in the will be diagnosed with breast cancer, and 3.1 million women in the United States have a current or past history of breast cancer, according to breastcancer.org. For Marilyn, one of those 3.1 million, cancer has taught her she can survive grief as she enters her third year of remission.
“There will be more of it in my life, no doubt, but I know that I can do things like let go, grieve intensely, and heal. I also have a heightened awareness of the reality that my life will eventually come to an end. And along with that awareness comes a desire to do what is most important to me, while I can.”
Sierra and Marilyn believe strongly in giving to organizations that support research and breast cancer support efforts. In October, 100 percent of the money donated in the coin canisters benefits the Pink Ribbon Girls, as well as 10 percent of sales from the Pink Ribbon Bagels. On certain days, 100 percent of the bagel sales benefit the organization (click here for store dates and details).
For those wishing to support the cause ahead of time or in higher quantities of delicious carbs, preorders are available online and in stores.
