We’ve likely all been listening to Christmas songs since before Thanksgiving now. Has anyone been humming this tune on repeat?
Rocking around the Christmas tree
You will get a sentimental feeling when you hear
Voices singing, let’s be jolly
Deck the halls with boughs of holly
Rockin’ around the Christmas tree
Have a happy holiday
Everyone dancin’ merrily
In the new old-fashioned way
Other years my spirit has faced it well, but this year, in particular, grief rocks right around that Christmas tree and while other merry voices may be singing loud to hear, a new pain mutes this normally jolly tune for me.
I see you grief-stricken spirits this holiday season, as you rise up to meet this time with intention, to face it with joy amidst the trial, and yet you struggle to know how to step in the space with the same merriment as before.
First, things first, give yourself grace because you are healing.
It is ok if mourning rocks your tree this holiday and you need to step back from the hustle and simplify your pace in order to breathe. It is a source of love to set space aside for self-care and focus on your heart strength.
I am a dancing, loving, tradition-setting kind of holiday gal, but there are some seasons where the intentional investment of that rhythm takes a different beat of healing in its place of sentiment.
What if, in this season, as you face your triggers of grief, you focus on a different kind of dance?
Dare to say no to the invitation lists that would send you into exhaustion and say yes to the places that usher calm to your fighting spirit.
Adapt to the changing chapter and allow yourself to simply be present in what today invites you to be.
Notice the places that you can speak honor and remembrance for your loved one this season and create a new tradition that gives voice to this new place of showing love for them.
Create your own kind of Christmas songs this season. If rockin’ around the tree is harder for you to voice, then write down the words you can hum in rhythm to this year.
Extend empathy to your fellow suffering community by attending a grief support group or inviting your people to know your triggers and how to best support you this year.
It is ok if your expectations are lowered and, in fact, I highly encourage that intentional perspective.
Healing ushers places of quiet retreat and processing at times, but that doesn’t mean you can’t dance it out in that place as well.
Find your song my friend and know that if merriment feels like a distant friend, then it is not lost, for you are just dancing a different tune right now.